A day-by-day guide to That Which Annoys, as culled from the procrastination-heavy Bileduct that is Twitter's @SISPURRIER.
MONDAY) HATING OF THE DAY: The prevalence of twinkly whimsical folksy wankmusic in ALL modern TV advertising: True cause of the spending downturn.
TUESDAY) HATING OF THE DAY: Those who use cellphones as status symbols. Go buy the NEW DOGPIZZLE-5000, with ergonomic cockshape & forehead attachment
WEDNESDAY) HATING OF THE DAY: The proximity of “call hostess” to “reading light”. Takeoff is fraught enough, fucker, without the BONGBONGBONG of FAIL.
THURSDAY) HATING OF THE DAY: Anyone with a handgun which a) doesn’t have awesome red fins, or b) can’t be set to “stun”. HATEBULLETS ARE ALL YOU NEED.
FRIDAY) HATING OF THE DAY: The inexplicable lack of Total Cosmic Heatdeath every time someone refers to a footballer as a “Role Model For Kids.”